Publish date: 6 June 2023
This carers week, Paula Darkin, mouth care lead dental nurse/trainer and carer for her dad talks about juggling work and caring.
I’m the Mouth Care Lead Dental Nurse/Trainer for the trust – I teach Mouth Care Matters. This is a Health Education England programme, which is a training initiative aimed at improving the health of the mouth of adult patients in our hospitals and the community. I support the staff, patients, families, and carers.
I also help my dad who is independent but, due to his complex medical history, is housebound and relies on me for his everyday needs.
I first realised I was a carer when my mam passed away 7 years ago. My dad was heavily reliant on her. After she passed, I became his carer and took over. He slightly became more reliant on me as he became more frail and misses her badly.
I take care of his everyday needs – I visit him every day, help him with his washing and ironing, get his shopping in, help him tidy up (he has cleaners that come in, so it is just a general tidy up), and change his bed linen. We sit and chat, and I take him out on a weekend for his mental health. We have 'car picnics' at the coast as he likes to take his camera to take photos.
I take him to his multiple hospital/doctor/nurse appointments (which are every month). He comes to stay with me when he is poorly. We visit garden centres as he likes to look at 'garden things'. He can't walk far, so I take him everywhere in his wheelchair. Generally, I look after his health and well-being.
I work full-time, and then all my spare time is dedicated to my dad.
I wish I'd been told how tiring caring and working was; then I would have had my 3 shredded wheat!!!
But joking aside, we have a Carers Staff Network, which I try to attend as many meetings as possible. This can be difficult as I teach, but the network has helped me incredibly as there is lots of support out there and a listening ear. I feel that I have someone to talk to.
Being a carer can be very lonely. Carers Week is important as it raises awareness about the support that can be accessed. It's lovely to know that you are not alone, that there is help and support.
For more information about support available visit local carers organisations: